Two

Today, Sachin turns two.

It's been coming a while. Well, it's been coming since his last birthday (duh), but for the past few weeks we've really felt it.

To M - 'Can you believe he is TWO?!'

We turn and watch him. Talking, playing, being all grown up like only a two year old can be. Like only someone who is being watched through the eyes of the people who have known him all his life, can seem.

The thing is, is that we remember everything like it was yesterday. Wasn't I pregnant with him just last month? Wasn't he born like, 5 minutes ago? All of the versions of him we've been lucky enough to have so far, are so fresh and etched into us, that it just feels impossible. Impossible that two years ago today, at 9.40am, the three of us met each other for the first time.

These memories are both so fresh that they feel new, so deep they feel life long.

The cliche of time flying never becomes more used, more felt, than when you are watching someone's days, weeks, months, turn into years. We have watched this little human being become a person. We have helped this little person put in to motion the wheels of who he will become.

And everyday he becomes more and more wonderful. Astonishing, really.

We've been asking him these past few days;

'How old are you Sachin?'
' Two minutes!'
'Nearly...' we encourage.
After thinking about it, ' Two old!' he says confidently.

Close enough baby, close enough.

Happy Birthday my darling boy x

Bossypants Post AKA I love Tina Fey

I've been meaning to write about this for aggggges. Well, actually I think the book has been out for about about 3 weeks, but whatever, I'm excited to write about this.

So you know Tina Fey right? You love 30 Rock? You maybe caught her Sarah Palin act that took the interwebs by storm and was fantastic? (If you answered no to any of these, I'm afraid we may not be talking anymore)

Tina Fey wrote a book. Then she went and voiced the audiobook too. It is BRILLIANT. It's funny, and smart, and covers everything from what happens when your honeymoon is almost ruined when the cruise ship you are on is sinking, to why women don't fucking care if men don't think we're cute. It also rather hilariously covers motherhood, working in TV and long car journeys.

Please, buy it. Download it. Laugh so much you wet yourself.

A Mother’s Prayer for Her Child By Tina Fey

“First, Lord: No tattoos. May neither Chinese symbol for truth nor Winnie-the-Pooh holding the FSU logo stain her tender haunches.

May she be Beautiful but not Damaged, for it’s the Damage that draws the creepy soccer coach’s eye, not the Beauty.

When the Crystal Meth is offered, may she remember the parents who cut her grapes in half And stick with Beer. 

Guide her, protect her when crossing the street, stepping onto boats, swimming in the ocean, swimming in pools, walking near pools, standing on the subway platform, crossing 86th Street, stepping off of boats, using mall restrooms, getting on and off escalators, driving on country roads while arguing, leaning on large windows, walking in parking lots, riding Ferris wheels, roller-coasters, log flumes, or anything called “Hell Drop,” “Tower of Torture,” or “The Death Spiral Rock ‘N Zero G Roll featuring Aerosmith,” and standing on any kind of balcony ever, anywhere, at any age. 

Lead her away from Acting but not all the way to Finance. Something where she can make her own hours but still feel intellectually fulfilled and get outside sometimes And not have to wear high heels. What would that be, Lord? Architecture? Midwifery? Golf course design? I’m asking You, because if I knew, I’d be doing it, Youdammit.

May she play the Drums to the fiery rhythm of her Own Heart with the sinewy strength of her Own Arms, so she need Not Lie With Drummers. Grant her a Rough Patch from twelve to seventeen. Let her draw horses and be interested in Barbies for much too long, For childhood is short – a Tiger Flower blooming Magenta for one day – And adulthood is long and dry-humping in cars will wait.

O Lord, break the Internet forever, that she may be spared the misspelled invective of her peers And the online marketing campaign for Rape Hostel V: Girls Just Wanna Get Stabbed.

And when she one day turns on me and calls me a Bitch in front of Hollister, Give me the strength, Lord, to yank her directly into a cab in front of her friends, For I will not have that Shit. I will not have it. 

And should she choose to be a Mother one day, be my eyes, Lord, that I may see her, lying on a blanket on the floor at 4:50 A.M., all-at-once exhausted, bored, and in love with the little creature whose poop is leaking up its back. “My mother did this for me once,” she will realize as she cleans feces off her baby’s neck. “My mother did this for me.” And the delayed gratitude will wash over her as it does each generation and she will make a Mental Note to call me. And she will forget. But I’ll know, because I peeped it with Your God eyes. Amen.” 

In a world of pure imagination

One of the things I love watching develop in Sachin, is his play. When I was 19, I did work experience with a Play Specialist in the pediatric unit of a hospital. The idea is to use play as a therapy for children who are having a difficult time. In that case, it was children who were ill. It was fascinating. From the use of teddies to show how different operations worked, to drawing as art therapy. In hindsight it's something I could definately have gone on to do career wise (after that I spent the summer teaching kids photography at an American summer camp), but life took me in a different direction.

With Sachin, I love how his play is changing. From his basic looking at objects, eating them, moving them around, to the involvement of a new toy. His imagination. He started pretending about a month ago. He picked up my Mum's glasses case and pretended it was a car. Moving it around, crashing it into something, 'uh-oh!', then 'beep beep!'.

Ages ago (probably when I was pregnant) I found Made by Joel. I love the way he encourages his kids to use their imagination through simple paper crafts. His designs are just so damn cool too. Sach has just started to love anything with wheels, so I thought I'd print out some of Joels Paper City. To be honest, I thought they'd be too small and well, plain for Sachin right now. His toys are bright and big, and easy for little fingers. But to my surprise, he grabbed them straight from the printer and squealed with excitement, 'Bus! Bike! Ba! (van)'.

So I cut them out, stuck down a road and skyscraper print out, and let him play...

 He loved them. He named the little man Daddy and little woman Mummy. He moved the pieces around the table, proclaiming beep beep and uh oh when they crashed. He was in heaven for a good 30 minutes, which for this toddler means he was pretty much in love.

So thanks Joel, from a very happy toddler.

At 17 months

The last time I wrote a 'Sachins new tricks' post, he was 9 months. Wow, time flies. Reading that back it's so hard to remember the time when he seemed so big. And in retrospect he seems so wee. So here's a little insight into our life now, with/as a toddler.

These days, the conversations between Sachin and I are becoming much more two way. He has started asking questions. ALL THE TIME. A few weeks ago, he started pointing wildly at various things around him and suddenly came out with, 'Whats 'at?'

After months of us saying this to him (and answering the question too), he has turned the tables. I started by answering with exactly with it was he was pointing at. A few weeks into this game, and he still asks, even when he knows what he's pointing at. So now, in answer to this question I'll say, 'I don't know, what is that?' and he'll often reply with the correct answer.

We've now progressed on to other sentences too, 'What's this?', 'Who's that?' 'Who's there?'. His use of the th sound is still coming, so it becomes 'whas is?' and 'whos at?', but it's still very clear what he's saying.

Sachin: (Playing with the bedroom door, opening and closing it)

Me: Knock knock.

Sachin: Who's there?

Me: Shocked Face. He'd never said that before!

We also have other basic, two way conversations. His favourite goes like this -

M: Where's X, Sachin? (X can be me, or Nana or a toy, as long as he can't see them.)

S: X gone.

M: Gone where?

S: Hidy! (Hiding)

Then he goes hunting around for them. It's my favourite.

He has so many words now it's hard to keep track. The repetition is something he loves. He loves to hear the names for things, and having a go at saying them. Some words he can say brilliantly, and others not so much (but they are the cutest!)

Words that are clearly spoken:

Mummy, Daddy, Nana, Emma (Aunty), Baby, Hello, Hiya, Bye-Bye, Go, Gone, Boo, Nice, Car, Tedted (favourite teddy) Teddy, Jojo (toy), Ball, Bucket, Pea, Cheese, Eye, Hair, Toe, Heart, Circle, Star, Tickle, Up, Down, No, Turtle, Door, Bubble, Pop, Ta (thank you), Key, Apple, Kettle, He, Box, Tea, Purple, More

His own versions of words:

Noe (nose), Mou (mouth), Getti (spaghetti), Asta (pasta), Soon (spoon), Kni (knife),  Gaga (grandma), Titang (triangle), Outsi (outside), Ba (bath), Cumber (cucumber), cookie (cooking), Bickit (biscuit), Hidy (hiding), Carra (carrot), Bo (boat), Cugar (colour), Boo (blue), Gee (green), Uto (he says this all the time and we are clueless as to what it means!)

The best word though is - Nomnomnom. This is basicaly an all encompassing term for food! If you say, 'Sachin, are you hungry?' He often just replies with 'Nomnomnom'. Likewise, if he's eating, and approves, he'll normally say, 'Nomnomnom niiiice.' Honestly, it kills me with cuteness.

Learning the word no was a big deal for him. He is starting to grasp that not only can Mummy and Daddy say it, but he can too. The last week or so, if you're trying to do something he has no interest in, he'll say 'No', accompanied by a wagging finger, in this tiny stubborn voice. Pout implied!

His very favourite thing in the whole world, are circles. He loves to say the word and draw them, and is a little bit obsessed about it. He grabs crayons and paper anytime he can, and will shove the pen in your hand and bark 'Circle!'. He's started to draw them himself too, but still loves to watch you draw them. We taught him other shapes in the hope that he'd spread his shape love around. He can correctly identify circles, triangles, squares, stars and triangles from drawings. He's just started this week, to learn colours.

He still loves his books. He knows what two are called by sight, and requests them. He loves being read too.

At least once a day, he'll run into our bedroom, and you'll hear a little giggle while he waits for you to follow. There he can be found, sprawled out on our bed, waiting for us to jump in.

His hair is no longer a mohawk. Instead it's a bit crazy round the edges. Bed head at it's finest! I have no idea how to cut a toddlers hair. Tips?!

One of my favourite things to do, is to give him noodles and watch him go. He loves them too.

He loves to choose an object, say 'Ha! (hat) and then put it on his head. This is normally followed by 'Mummy/Daddy/Emma/Nana ha!' And we have to wear it too.

Bath time is the best. He would play for hours in there if I let him. I love getting in too, before he gets too big to share a bath with Mummy.

And I mentioned how beautiful he is too, right?

As every new month/week/day passes, we insist to each other, 'This is my favourite age!' Don't get me wrong, toddlers are hard work. Along with the new independence and personality, comes he own ideas about things. His own thoughts on what he wants to do and doesn't want to do. If you're not on the same page, let the screaming commence. He likes to test you, and somedays, if you were to eavesdrop into our house, all you would hear is 'Sachin, no!' When I hear M or my Mum saying this to him repetedly, it's comical. When I'm the one saying it, not so much.

But watching him become this person, it's amazing. So yeah, 17 months is my favourite age!

A Toy Story

Last week, we went to stay with some very dear friends who have three little girls. As you can imagine, walking into their house is a massive assault on the senses - and it always takes Sachin an hour or so to acclimatise to the noise, the hyperactivity, and the pink!

Between the three of them, they have every toy you can imagine, they are very lucky little girls. They have a massive play room filled with wendy houses, books, cars, musical instruments, and a LOT of babies.

When I say babies, I mean baby dollies. Small, plastic beings, with eyes that open and close according to whether they are upright or lying down. (If only real babies worked like this). They have every race, every size, with all the accessories. Usually they can be found in various states of undress, their little baby sized clothes lost at some point or another, during a nappy change or bath time no doubt.

Now, Sachin has a lot of toys. Many of them, the same as the girls. Bricks, books, musical instruments, balls...He doesn't however, have any little babies. This isn't really a concious decision. I'd estimate that 99% of his toys are gifts, and no-one has yet given him a dolly. But whilst in the house that was filled with pink, he was drawn to the little babies. He carefully piked them up and inspected them, called them 'baybee', put them in cots, and carried them around. At bath time, he would at some point, pick one up, wash it's hair, and leave it on the side of the bath to dry out.

It is highly likely that this love for the babies comes from his love of new things, as all toddlers have. Something different, something he doesn't normally get to play with. But I like to see that as well as being rough and tumble, and loud and stompy, he also has the capability to nurture. Something he does often with his teddies - sharing his milk and brushing their teeth before bed. I imagine that the idea of little babies being for little girls comes from the stereotypical role of women being the nurturers. But in our world, men are too. Sachin has parents who share childcare 50/50. His Daddy is also the one looking after the baby, cooking, washing, playing. And those are qualities I wish him to have too.

On the way home, M and I discussed it.

Me: Sachin really liked playing with the little dollies.
M: Yeah.
Me: I might buy him one.
M: Hmm... (thinking) OK yeah. But can you choose a masculine one?
Me: A masculine one?
M: Yeah, like a cowboy. A cowboy baby!

M was only half joking, I realise. A little baby is not seen as a very 'boy' thing to play with. M grew up in a house where toys were scarce, in fact he only really had a few books and toy cars, so the option would never have been there. I grew up in a house of girls and so never had cars or bricks. I like the idea that Sachin has no gender specific toys. At this age, I don't think there is a lot of difference between boys and girls anyway, and I don't feel the need to encourage one.

What did you play with when you were little? Was it all pink for girls and blue for boys in your house? I guess if you have a family of mixed siblings then there really is no divide?

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to find a cowboy baby...